Warning: This post is not recommended for men! Feel free but don't say I didn't warn you!
Pregnant Women around the world could compile a list of all the raw truth you will learn about pregnancy that would make a strong man woozy! There are so many of these untold "joys" that women experience during the "greatest 10 months" of your life that are simply put just plain terrifying! Maybe you had friends who were kind enough to be honest about some of the scary bits, maybe you found a good blog or had an honest doctor. I learned a lot in my 1st pregnancy and here I am re-learning in my second!
This is my list of the worst of pregnancy!
1.
Leaking Boobs - If they weren't large enough or uncomfortable enough, we get to experience leaks as well? I never really had it throughout my pregnancy as much as you will definitely experience it post-partum but one thing is for sure, on top of EVERYTHING else that your body will go through, this one makes me curse the most! Just when you think you're all clear of the leaking, BAMM in the middle of the mall or grocery store a nice kind mom walking by will kindly point out that you look like a kiddie pool that sprung a leak! Thanks Boobs, and after everything we've been through together?? FOR SHAME!
2.
Cankles - This issue is much more severe with this pregnancy and I didn't welcome it then and I can't say I welcome it now either! Cankles,
" Haven't seen your ankles in a while? You could be suffering from the dreaded canckles!" Quote provided by Dr. Oz, makes me laugh every time! I heard about cankles.. but I never got cankles! I wasn't that kind of girl! Then I got pregnant, thankfully Ava was due in January so I didn't experience a lot of the summer being pregnant so I didn't get the full experience of cankles and then I was on bed rest from 20 weeks on so I didn't experience it much then either but this baby...WOW!
Being that Baby 2 is due November 16th, it felt like I spent most of my "growing" during the summer months and experienced cankles on the DAILY! I spent most of the summer hiding in doors as much as possible because my feet looked like little marshmallows in flip-flops, couldn't keep my make up on from sweating so much, I waddled and I had cankles! Enter sob here!
3.
Urinary Incontinence aka.. Peeing a little during a sneeze! We've all been there, that moment you feel a large sneeze approaching, now this I find really unfair, because you are told that during pregnancy you may experience more nasal stuffiness that before because of the hormones and blood flow blah blah blah! I got the nasal stuffiness more than ever before and I'm normally pretty stuffed up so a sneeze
was sooo very welcomed cause it gave me this brief heavenly moment of being able to breathe through both nostrils! So now I'm pregnant and I feel a sneeze approaching and after this happens the first time, a sneeze is almost permanently ruined for you because this sense of fear comes over you," Will this be the moment I pee myself in public?" Now, if you're reading this and you've never experienced this yet, it's like that moment that you are driving and you feel the biggest sneeze coming on, this fear comes over you because for that 5 seconds, you have no idea what is about to happen! I am thankful that anytime I have "peed a little" I was at home..... WHEW!
4.
Pregnancy Brain/ Mommy Brain. For some reason, when you are pregnant and this beautiful little being is growing inside you, not only are they taking almost any sign of a nutrient from the food and liquid you consume, but they require you to take extra vitamins, which they take too! But now this little tiny being is stealing your brain functions both before and after. I have become absent minded...AGAIN! I swear pregnancy is just like being introduced to yourself as in old age! I made coffee the other morning, without putting a cup in the
Keurig. So my lovely counter got the 1st cup and y'all know how much I love my coffee!!
Mommy Brain; Virtually the same thing but only a lot more understandable! The interrupted sleep times, the fear, the joy, the everything associated with being a new mom and trying to function in the "normal" world, is enough to make any mommy lose her mind or temporarily miss place it!
5.
Swollen Vagina; During and after. Now this one is probably my most dreaded "joy" of pregnancy and I'm sure every other women will agree! Close your eyes for one moment...breathe deep and picture a man with swollen balls trying to walk! Funny isn't it? You're welcome!
They told me not to look... but once you've been told not to, you most certainly have too, right? So I looked and it was a bit scary, wow, the things that change! This beautiful miracle of growing a child and my lady bits look like.... WHAT? I can't begin to comfort you on this one and explain how normal it is and promise that it will go back to normal that you are not going to be scarred forever, but truth is, that image will stay with you for a while! At least until you're done with the squirt bottle that they give you once you leave the Hospital to help clean the stitches you will get should your child not fit perfectly coming out of your vagina! That squirt bottle will be your best friend, I remember thinking I lost it one time, when in fact it had just fallen off the back of the toilet and down the side by the garbage can, all the pregnancy hormones in me exploded like
Huaynaputina, the largest Volcanic Eruption in South America's history.
So there we have it ladies.. those are my top pregnancy joys as they have affected me! If you'll excuse me I'm off to find a Snoogle and a belly band for support as the weight of my ever-growing belly is starting to cause pain to my back making me unable to stand long enough to cook dinner... err wait, maybe I should take a nap and my husband can cook dinner! The house will clean itself right??
