Pregnancy Hormones and coffee

 I've been trying all week to do a new blog and I've gotten many started but this week and well last week, I'm just not feeling it! There are a lot of topics that I'd like to write about but my personal life, pregnancy hormones and stress seems to be taking over. A lot of it is extremely personal so those areas will be off limits for now until they've run their natural course but as depicted in the story below.. pregnancy hormones and coffee or lack of, can make for some rough times!

I look at this pregnancy and don't get me wrong, I love my little being that is growing inside but the hormones have been a bit much! I often wonder have the hormones caused me to do any permanent damage to my 5 year old Ava or is she still young enough to not remember that time when Mommy turned into a monster?   My patience is shot, my memory is terrible and I'm grouchy! I don't want to be understanding, I don't want to easy going, and I don't want to feel like a child throwing a tantrum anymore cause I just don't want to! I want to be pregnant and have people understand that my hormones are crazy and not to stick your fingers in the damn bear cage!

 

I'm so terribly confused because I cannot tell if my hormones are playing tricks on me or if I have just cause for being so short at times. The following story is a perfect example of pregnancy hormones at its highest and scariest, don't say I didn't warn you!

The trip to Saskatoon, we were leaving Golden BC, after a very short sleep from an emotional night and short my morning coffee.  I find myself in the line up for Tim Horton's on our way out of town. Of course the guy in front of me orders a damn sandwich, when all I want is my cup of coffee. I'm hormonal, I'm tired and my 5 year old has decided to start the morning off by asking questions about everything and everything.

So I wait.. and I wait! Foot tapping..."Come on... I just want my coffee!" The guy finally gets his sandwich, it feels like it's been 10 minutes at this point. I now have to explain to my daughter why I cannot honk at him, he very slowly leaves the drive-through.  So I'm at the window with my money in my hand holding it out the window and eagerly towards her at the window. She finishes taking the order of the person at the menu board.. she's going to take my money now and hand me my coffee now right? WRONG..... she talks to her co-worker for a second and I explode. I actually yelled out loud with my child in the back seat, "GIVE ME MY DAMN COFFEE!"

 

Now I'm embarrassed right? Wrong again! I'm even more mad because she blankly stares at me then says," 2 milk?" I proceed to almost rip this poor girl apart explaining to her that "I'm pregnant and I'm tired and I just want the double-double I ordered. So two sugars and two creams, not two milks!"  We bicker back and forth about what she said, what she's handing me and why I don't have time for this crap, and by the way...she still hasn't given me my damn coffee! I'm not even a time bomb at this point cause I've already exploded but she's now about to get hit with a pile of tears if she doesn't just give me my damn coffee NOW!

Anyways, she hands me the coffee... it's terrible! I just drive and begin to start crying! I cried from Golden until 30 minutes before Lake Louise!  I truly feel for the girl in the drive-through at Tim Horton's, so if you read this by some weird off chance.. I'M SORRY!

So this is me right now and it means I'm having a hard time updating my blog...so please bear with me and for all my mommy friends, if you have any advice for dealing with the pregnancy hormones please pass them along. Crying into my pancakes was one thing but losing my mind of a poor innocent girl is another! HELP!